Ego - Balancing the 'I'

Sometime back, I put together a presentation on Ego to share with my team during staff, just as something that we could discuss other than our work deliverable, but an important topic for a healthy work life. Below is what I had put together. Hope you find it valuable!

EGO: What is this 3 letter word that is thrown on us at many instances of our lives?

The Dictionary defines EGO as ‘the “I” or self of any person; a person as thinking, feeling, and willing, and distinguishing itself from the selves of others and from objects of its thought.

So do we have Nil Ego!?

                - The theory of moderation plays its role again. Like anything in life that aligns with ‘too much is too bad’, Ego too has its limits and the line between good and bad ego is hardly defined - making it easier for you to be blind.

                - The ‘Healthy Ego’ is vital to motivate you and to accomplish higher goals; Ego is what drives you higher. But if abused and not controlled, it could topple you down the hill!

Small actions that aid in a long term cure for balancing your ego:

·         Don’t be Prejudiced:

                - When you are prejudiced what people tell you fall on deaf ears. Your mind is listening, but you reject what you don’t want to hear.

                - Have an open mind. Hear out from others. Explain your views in response instead of in contrary. This way you will learn more and be admired more.

                                  “Hard to follow, Easier just said.
             The bigger person you are -  When you aren’t biased.”

·         Give yourself credits. But humble yourself more often:

                                - This helps you remember that you’re lucky to be where you are and that there are people in more trying situations working through much more troubles. Humbling yourself makes you grateful; and sure helps kill the ego.

Melt your ‘Self’ away: There was this quote by Mahatma Gandhi on the first page of my school textbooks that I remember clearly in spite of my rusty memory of the other pages in the books J I think of this whenever I feel low or when I want to feel more humbled. I hope it makes a mark for you too!

Gandhiji’s Talisman:

                "I will give you a talisman. Whenever you are in doubt, or when the self becomes too much with you, apply the following test. Recall the face of the poorest and the weakest man [woman] whom you may have seen, and ask yourself, if the step you contemplate is going to be of any use to him [her]. Will he [she] gain anything by it? Will it restore him [her] to a control over his [her] own life and destiny? In other words, will it lead to swaraj [freedom] for the hungry and spiritually starving millions?
Then you will find your doubts and yourself melt away.”

Controlling the EGO:

Controlling your ego is like controlling a diet: When you go beyond your diet plan and eat that cake, it makes you feel high and happy for those few minutes but later you are filled with regret of wishing you had held back because now you have to exercise harder. Similarly when ego not controlled may become very hard to fix. In reality, much tougher than the extra mile you need to run for the cake you ate.

Ego haunts us everywhere. Why is it so much more significant at a workplace?

•       The people around you are colleagues, not family: You may not be able to explain your emotional reasons behind an egoistic action. Your colleague may not care to comfort you or understand you and forget your act of ego.

•       You may talk to people who you’ve never met earlier. A bad first impression might affect all future work with them.

•       Non egoistic attitude makes working easier for you as you are more ready to approach for help, and also make yourself approachable to others. This creates a healthy work environment.

•       You could be fired :P (Just kidding J)

Lead … not just You. Control the ego and lead others along.